why didn't you poke me back
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Randomize
