Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
