I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
No subtext here. People are naked.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
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