thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Come see our sink grown plant.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
