You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh�
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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