I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
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