theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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