it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
