kristin has been a bad kristin
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
