My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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