the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Please, let me fuck your mom
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
