clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
