shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
