If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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