On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Randomize
