I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize