Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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