He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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