Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
