Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
