So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
