I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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