Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
