don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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