I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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