Where did you get a picture of my penis
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Damn victory sex feels great
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
