it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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