yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
