I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
