Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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