WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
how can u be prego again
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize