i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
