We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Randomize
