My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
