I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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