At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
