I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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