Having a random hookup so left but love u
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
