I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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