so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
