margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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