he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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