when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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