oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
