Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
