I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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