I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
