1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
