So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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