Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Duck Duck Cougar?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Randomize
